Blaze
by we are the light
Summary: It began with a spark, and has now become a blaze that President Snow will struggle to contain. The rebellion has started and there's no turning back. sequel to Spark, Cato/OC
1. Chapter 1

**It began with a spark, and has now become a blaze that President Snow will struggle to contain. The rebellion has started and there's no turning back.**

{-.-}

On that day two days ago I walked off that train into the arms of my family. Not at first because when I first got off I was stunned and completely at a loss for words. I couldn't quite understand the amount of people, coupled with the overwhelming sights and smells of home. I felt as if I hadn't been away for weeks, but more like years. I'd also never felt so alien here. All of this was so different and strange I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry about it. But once I'd become a little calmer and more used to my surroundings I finally saw my family approaching through the crowds with beaming smiles on their faces. The first of them to hug me was my mother and my father who looked a little tired maybe.

My mother in particular suddenly looked a few years older. There were a few more little lines around her eyes and she looked youthful enough before all of this. I think she'd been having trouble sleeping. Then my father looks to be just the same, but again that tiredness is in his face too. It appeared to me that my parents have been greatly affected by the Games.

She started crying when she got to a few metres away as if I'd come home in a coffin. Maybe she was expecting that and maybe me coming home in this way was something that she couldn't quite grasp. I want to say that they were tears of joy but again, I couldn't tell. To be perfectly honest though, I started crying too. Dad had tears in his eyes but refused to cry. The most important thing about this moment to them was the fact that I was home; their little girl was home and that was all that mattered. They both held me so tightly I was afraid that I was suddenly going to get pulled away from them by Peacekeepers.

"You're home now," mom whispered in my ear, "You're safe."

Despite the roaring and joyful nature of the crowd around us and my homecoming in general, I suddenly felt very upset. I've missed her soothing voice and I've missed my father's stubbornness to show how much he cares. My feelings that day ranged from sorrow to pure joy and I could never pinpoint what emotion I felt exactly. Then after my parents finally managed to let me go, Cedar and Tanner greeted me separately.

Cedar held me the tightest out of anyone. He didn't smile, he looked kind of in shock and vaguely disturbed the whole time. The look in his face means something. Is he affected by what I did in the arena or is it something else that has caused him to look like this? What I can gather is that the brother in front of me has turned colder maybe, "Hey sis," he said quietly.

I didn't say anything back to him. My emotions were all jumbled and I wasn't sure whether I felt happy or sad. We stood there whilst he held me in place and I buried my head into his chest. He smelt of the forest and just slightly of burning paper. _Home,_ I had to tell myself, _you're home and you need to see this. No more death, no more fighting. You have a life ahead of you so look forward to it._ He kissed my forehead briefly and then he let go, signalling that we've been too long.

Tanner and Cherry were next, and both hugged me at the same time. They both looks glowing, radiant almost with how coupley and how in love they are. They must have been so strong throughout the Games because they have such a close bond with each other. They can understand each other like that whereas the rest of my family tend to bottle up thing and anger is usually the only way for it to come out. It's overwhelming to think that I'm here at this point and I suddenly cave in and cry. I haven't ruined their wedding. I haven't put a black mark on their happy future. My survival has ensured that they'll be fine.

If I had died, I wonder whether it would have split them up. Tanner is the sort of person who doesn't deal with bad new lightly. He's hot-headed and at times gentle and caring. She calms him, I note, with her sweet voice and her genuinely kind nature. Cherry is more than enough for Tanner and for all of us. She gets on with everyone and that is something which is quite frankly impossible for most of us.

We all managed to get through the crowds quite easily when people recognise me. All were congratulatory and happy with easy smiles and occasional pats on the back which unnerves me more because it was all so surreal and completely foreign to me. My District is proud of me. I don't know what for and maybe I will never understand. My mother clutched my arm the whole time, and I lost the feeling in it at one stage.

We went home to our house which borderlines the worst part of town where crime is rife. It's a simple building, one floored with all of the rooms surrounding one main area that we use for cooking, eating and being as a family. And of course, it's made from wood which makes it particularly draughty in winter and lets in all of the bug you just don't want. However much I complain about our house it's a lot more comfortable than some families here in 7. But money doesn't matter now, I have too much.

I never dreamed of saying those words in all of my life. It's strange to suddenly have the world at your feet; where you can basically have such a great say in thing when before you were nothing. I suddenly count, and if I wasn't counted before then I'm not sure I want to be this time.

We ate lunch together that afternoon all round the too-small table and odd chairs. All beaming smiles and no mention of the Games whatsoever. The chatter is just local news about people who I've barely heard of or known about in my entire life here. It's just meant to ease my nerves and to fill what would be silence. I almost forget about the Games completely until Cedar suddenly starts to talk about things and the picture now becomes very different to me. It was like my eyes had been opened as we're not a solid family unit anymore, the Games are here too.

They taint everything now. There is no chance that I will ever escape them.

"Is your boyfriend not coming to say hello to us yet?"

It's the worst time for me to feel offended. We were all sat round the small table with our elbows basically knocking and I'm sandwiched between my mother and Tanner with Cedar opposite me. His mocking tone made me grip the knife in my hand harder and for a second I felt as if I was going to kill him. It was as if something snapped inside, as I don't like him acting possessive and nor do I appreciate it. I'm almost nineteen, he's twenty. He should act his age.

There's an awkward silence around the table and the scratching of plates and metal is the only thing that disturbs the silence. I glare at him and his brilliantly blue eyes look back into mine _cold_. I wonder whether this is all about me suddenly becoming interested in guys. It was sudden, but I never received any kind of attention here because I was that girl who works hard to make ends meet. I was the girl who tries to prove everyone wrong. If Cato does ever come to 7, then I know that Cedar will have a few words with him.

'You hurt my sister and I'll snap your neck'; or something along those lines I can bet.

"You don't know anything about us," I snarl, the urge to stab the knife into the table becomes great because I have to prove my point; I'm not wrong about anything here, "You do not know what it's like to go through the arena and to need support. Did you kill two people in cold blood? Did you relish in it like I did? No. You didn't."

I don't even want to see my family's reaction at my comments so I got up and left, dropping the knife on the table which caused Cherry to jump quite a bit. I left the house in a sprint so I would lose my family and so they would just leave me be. Without a lot of planning I went to the Justice building thinking that this would be a better place to go. No-one is used to this version of me quite yet. I'm not usually rude to my family, but to me what Cedar was saying was the greatest insults to me and Cato. Mocking seemed to infuriate me for some reason. Whilst at the Justice building I collected the key to my new house and just leave everyone that I've claimed to miss behind.

I then spend the rest of that day alone, and with my relatives apparently panicking an incredible amount. When they finally find me, I'm inside my new house just looking at all of the provided furniture and finery the Capitol showers me in. I tell them I don't want to go home and stay with them tonight. I want them to leave me alone.

But today, two days on I wake up by myself in my new house in Victor's Village, somewhere which is sparsely inhabited. There are about twelve houses here and only six are now occupied; including mine and it's surrounded by a private wooded area. We're almost barred off from the rest of the District in the worst way possible and I live too far from my parent's home although a part of me wills myself to not care about that. I'm an adult after all. I suddenly feel like a trophy of this District and I'm completely uncomfortable with the fact that there is such a difference in status here.

Mom stayed with me the previous day in the new house regardless of my attempts to be left truly alone. She said it was just to help to move stuff in and to make sure I settled fine but I'm not that stupid. I might live alone here but she knows that things are different with me; I'm different. The whole incident on my first day home was something which has really scared them. Usually something like mockery and sarcasm with Cedar would be proceeded by a horrible comment back or some sort of playful punch but at this time the smallest things are starting to set me off. I know I don't like it and I want it to change, but how?

But the worst thing about being home is that nightmares don't stop. I have no-one to console me anymore and no-one just to say 'you're fine'. I miss Cato, and I have a feeling that because we left each other where we did we had questions that still needed to be answered. Above that, I miss his presence. He comforts me.

In this new nightmare I have my family are hurt, tortured and mutilated and I'm forced to watch. It's my greatest fear which is being played upon and it does scare me because it does feel real. The cries of pain, the blood and everything is just too real. When I eventually wake up I scream because the horrors replaying in my mind are on constant loop. But I'm alone today, no-one is there to comfort me and to hold me close to them. I feel so isolated at home right now. But my mother will come round this morning to check if I'm alive, it has almost become her thing to do.

I asked them not to move in with me. I'm an adult and I need to be treated like one. I'm done with the babying and being treated a child. This is my stand. I will buy my parents a nicer house in the nicer part of town and Cedar can do as he wishes. Cherry and Tanner have secured a house ready for when they finally get married. Now it's my turn to fledge and to become my own person. According to my mother the marriage between my brother and his fiancé is in a month.

I get out of bed and take a cold shower to wake me up and to bring me into reality. I then get dressed into my old clothes I use for going out into the forest in; a plain faded red t-shirt, jeans (ratty, bedraggled and faded) and my checked jacket. The check pattern is made up of red, black and white which has gone a grey colour. I've even had to put patches of rag like fabric on the elbows because it's so worn out. We never bought clothes often as they weren't seen as a necessity and we would wear them until they fall apart. I suppose this will always be something I'll do regardless of how much money I now have because these are common District 7 values.

I go downstairs and Mom is already there making me some breakfast. I wonder how long she's been there since judging by the sunlight from outside it must be quite early. This must be the beginning of a pattern, I think. She's doing this and preparing breakfast so I don't have to near any sharp items. After the incident with the knife at the table a few days ago it's pretty clear that everyone is scared or quite wary of being around me. How frightening is it to think that she's scared of her own daughter.

"I made you some eggs and toast," she says, turning around to see me with a slightly pained smile on her face. It's a smile which obviously means she doesn't know how to be around me. Trying the soft approach just makes me more unsettled because it makes her seem as if she's grovelling to me.

I sit down at the too big table and she puts it in front of me with a knife and fork. I eat in silence whilst she watches me. I feel as if I'm being preyed upon by a hawk and I don't feel particularly comfortable about it. Once finished I go to wash the cutlery and she again goes to watch me. It's still quiet as I fill up the sink with boiling hot water and some kind of liquid which is just being used for washing up. Once the sink is slightly full I stop the tap and look at her because she isn't quite saying anything and it really is making things uncomfortable between us.

"Cedar wants to talk to you."

I narrow my eyes at her in disbelief. Talking to him will not be a simple process and she should realise this. I am stubborn; it's a trait both me and him share and that is where our downfall lies, "None of you understand how much his comments stung, do you? You don't care that he is mocking my choices."

She suddenly looks very hurt, and a momentary pang of guilt engulfs me before I manage to quell it. I shouldn't feel guilty in the slightest, "We care Willow, he cares about you. It was just a shock to us all when you both declared that you loved each other since you've never really shown an interest in anyone before."

At the last statement my cheeks burn. It is true, no-one ever showed an interest in my so I never showed an interest in anyone. I shared kisses with boys on New Year's Day because that was tradition, but other than that relationships have never been at the forefront of my mind. My worst fears about things not being believed are coming true, "But do you understand the reasoning for my feelings?"

"A little," she sighs, "But please do not shove us away. We all love you very much."

I narrow my eyes at her even more, scrutinizing her and feeling more and angrier by the second. Playing the love card was to be expected, and it makes me feel even guiltier. I deal with enough guilt from the people that I killed in the Games and the brass mockingjay pin that sits by my bed.

No more. I'm not being blamed for anything else.

"Correction: you loved the old me and not this thing standing in her place."

I hope my tone breaks her, it's bitter and dark enough I can see tears well in her eyes. My mother doesn't look scared, but she genuinely looks very hurt. Her eyes look to the ground in front of me before she looks up and right at me.

_Guilt, guilt, guilt._

"Are you ok Willow? Are you really ok?" She asks very quietly. It can't even be described as a whisper.

I shake my head, I try and make myself calm for my reply but anger is here too, "No mom. No I'm not."

"Is there anything I can do for you?" I look to the floor. I feel so puny and helpless and perhaps she doesn't quite realise that she's doing this to me, "What about tomorrow, what do you want to do for your birthday?"

That is trivial. For me celebrating my birthday is the least of my concerns right now. This is not a time for jubilance and joy, and I don't think even I can celebrate my birthday. It was something that I looked forward to, something which really was the highlight of my year because the depressing Games were almost always over and I believed that I would never get reaped.

"Y'know what mom?" I suddenly bark, my frustration being taken out on my mother in a rather unfair way, "I don't care anymore."

I leave the house, slamming the door behind me because whatever she's saying isn't helping. I feel patronized and weak and right now I don't care whether the whole of the District is assembled to find me, I just need to be alone.

{-.-}

**Short; I know. When I'm back I've got another scene to add onto this but I promised you something and here it is *sigh*. Oh god I feel like such a disappointment. Coupled with this I'm away for two weeks tops. But I'll be writing when away and hopefully the next time I'll update they'll be a load more added to this chapter.**

**Anyway, I'll see you soon. Promise.**


	2. Chapter 2

I leave in such a hurry that I don't even look back. The only thing that keeps me company is the unfamiliar sound of coins in my pocket, and not just a few either. I have more than enough on me which I could spend on meaningless things that I don't need. The wealthy here would spend them on anything, little trinkets which mean nothing other than power. Whereas right now, this feeling of having a lot of money scares me and my frugal attitudes to spending will always stay with me However, I think that going to the forest is a better option than the centre of town right now.

In the town people usually say hello to me. They want to be seen with me and the revel in the fact that they have a new victor. I'm wary around these people because some of them were the ones who laughed at me when I was younger. Their pleasantries will never strike me as real, but always fake. Going to the forest means no disturbances unless I go to a certain sector where the current work is going on, as all of our work is done on certain parts at different times of the year.

There's a place in the forest which means a lot to me, but it's where everyone goes for their lunchtime break. It will be deserted now because everyone is working. We start early in the morning and end early evening which is grueling, yes but we don't have a choice in it. The freedom of choice is eliminated in Panem.

So I go, I leave Victor's Village and head to the outskirts of town with my head down and my focus kept on being invisible. This is fairly simple at this time because almost everyone is working and the outskirts are scarcely inhabited by people. The worker's station is where I go to, which is quite literally a small booth where the workers would collect supplies needed for the day ahead. The booth is set between one open part of the fence that separates the public from the forest which is being worked on at the moment. It's easy enough to slip past the booth by keeping low to the ground. Peacekeepers only come here during the morning to make sure people are here to work and that no-one decides not to turn up.

Workers are monitored by supervisors at times, but there is still the chance to hunt for food or to walk away for a bit. They understand how hard life can be here. Peacekeepers who monitored our comings and goings here are not forgiving, and unless you're dying you have to show up to work. I noticed that straight after I came back I had no job to go to; obviously I am disposable.

Once past the booth I stand up knowing that anyone in there is unable to see me as the back wall is pure solid wood with no window. Regardless, I sprint into the forest until the familiar cover of pine trees protects me because the penalties of getting caught are too much.

Flogging. It's not even something I want to think about. I've seen it enough times as we're all forced to see it, and that was disturbing enough. People can die, but if I think about it seeing it happen is nothing like what I've seen in the arena. The thing that hurts me more than watching people in pain is watching children get hurt, and no I'm not joking about this. Children are treated like adults, so stealing or trespassing can result in many flogs, killing them.

I will say this about our Head Peacekeeper, he's not a forgiving man. You don't cross him unless you really want to die.

As I get under what should be familiar surroundings the problem is is that it suddenly isn't familiar at all. I'm reminded of the Games, my misdeeds and everything bad that has happened to me in the few hellish weeks I've had. It's the trees, the actual terrain and everything around me just reminds me of my torment and troubles. My pulse quickens fear starts to engulf me . How ironic is it that my home District now reminds me of everything bad? I tell my inner mind to calm down and I try and reason with myself that this isn't the Games. But my hand goes to my hip to find an axe that is usually there; and there isn't one.

I'm not protected, in a forest which has bears and I'm struggling to think. I can't adjust to normality.

It's cool today but quite overcast. Despite this I feel so hot and flustered because of all the nerves coursing through my veins. I expect mutts, other tributes and perhaps Peacekeepers to come after me and to hurt me along with the other threats of being in a forest. I run again to my left in the direction of my safe haven. I know these trees and this place like the back of my hand, yet I won't hang about just to admire the beauty as I usually do.

Eventually my chest heaves with sobs and with being out of breath. I tell myself just to grow up again because I am done with being weak, I have to be strong now for the sake of everyone around me. I feel like I'm mad trying to console myself but in this sort of situation but I have no-one to console me now. The clearing comes into view, and once I reach it I finally stop running. My lungs scream out for air that they greedily take, and there is a searing pain in my chest. A part of my mind tells me that this was wrong, that I shouldn't have run that fast for that long. The pain should tell me that but I relish it. I'm suffering for my weakness and it feels _good_.

Once a little more recovered I take in the surroundings that usually comfort me so much. It's a freshwater pond, which could be deemed to be quite big for what a pond is yet too small to be deemed to be a lake. The water is clear and there are lilies and other freshwater plants in abundance. I remind myself that this isn't the Games as when I look at this, I'm not afraid of District 7 anymore. This is truly my home and there's nothing to fear.

Safe. I am safe. No one will hurt me, I have literally nothing to fear. I push away my worries into a far corner of my mind but they come back every now and again like they want to rattle me.

I hear a snapping of twigs and I'm suddenly very alert. All my fears flood back and I almost whimper at everything around me. I have nothing to protect me from the threat of bears or any vicious wild animals and I am completely vulnerable and defenseless. I'm afraid of everything again. I bolt to the nearest coniferous tree and scramble up it as quickly as I can, my hands and knees becoming cut and scraped in my reckless movements. But getting hurt isn't something I care about when I could possibly die. I only stop climbing when I find a sturdy branch which is at least fifteen feet off of the ground which gives me a vague sense of security.

I sit tight, hugging my knees and praying that there isn't a bear or a mutt anywhere. I just don't need this. I don't want to be trapped here. I just came here to think and to have some time away from everyone yet everything has gone wrong. However I think my luck starts to turn when absolutely nothing appears, and I relax a little because a part of me starts to believe that I am safe once again; that all my fears are in my mind. My fears are brought around by my darkest part of my mind, my angst and anger from the Games.

It's that part that I want to tear out.

"Knew you'd be here somewhere."

I don't just jump at the sound of another human voice; I let out a cry of pain as I half expect some kind of attack to follow. I look down to see Cedar stood there in his t-shirt and trousers with an axe in his hand; he's probably just abandoned his work to come and find me. This seems a caring enough actions but the way he announced his arrival makes me sick. He didn't have to make me jump. He had a smile on his slightly dirt covered face, because it quickly fades when he sees the look on my own.

"Willow? You ok?"

"You scared me you insensitive jerk!" I shout at him. I hold back most of my raw emotion however, because if I actually did then things would be so bad between us.

He looks worried and a little hurt maybe. I can't really tell because it's so hard to read him sometimes. "Just come down ok? I wanted to talk to you anyway and I figured you'd be here at your sulking spot."

I narrow my eyes at him as I give him the biggest glare possible. I didn't mean to find him but he knows that this is the place where I love most. The way that he makes me look like a child though stirs some anger up inside of me, and from this I know that our meeting will be very frosty. Now I don't have to work I guess I could come here every day, but I'm not sure how much of me can take being reminded of the Games all the time. But I can't let them take over every inch of my life, quite simply, that is impossible for me to think about.

I climb down, tentatively and slowly in case I fall. I've never been afraid of falling and suddenly now I fear almost everything because of the fears that are slowly taking over my mind. I just don't feel like the same person anymore; I've become a wreck who just can't get used to normality. Once down I turn and face my brother and the first thing I see is that his eyes, the eyes I feel safe in look so sad and empty. The vibrant blue has faded.

"I'm sorry ok?" He says before sighing, "I just want you to be safe. You're my little sister and when I saw your boyfriend kill in the Gam-"

This crosses the line, even talking about those weeks in this way sickens me, "Do not even remind me of the Games," I say sternly. I have never been the one to dress down my brother and so it feels so alien to stand up for myself and Cato. But I need to do this to show my brother exactly how I'm feeling, "I know what he did. Do you remember what I did? I'm as bad as he is, if not worse."

"But you killed to survive. He killed for enjoyment; you should have seen the look on his face at the cornucopia-"

I lose my cool with him completely. Cedar is set on reminding me about the bad things and not about the good, and that seed of doubt starts to make me challenge everything about Cato's motives. I shouldn't as I trust Cato with my life, "You've forgotten the times where he's saved me, the times where he's spared me and cared for me!"

His eyes flicker to the dirt covered ground; his anger obviously showing, "I'm sorry Willow but I will never trust him, that's just the way it is. You need to remember that he's a Career who has been trained to kill in cold blood and is a puppet to the Capitol. He should have felt nothing towards you and I don't want you being toyed with-"

His words are too difficult to hear. They're painful and I want him to _stop_, "Cedar-"

"Before he gets rid of you like he did with everyone that he killed. You're not the same as before all of this and he's preying on you-"

"Cedar just stop!"

He does, and he looks at me as if I'm a fragile bird. My voice is shaky, I am teary because he's planting the idea in my mind that Cato is just with me because he sees me as a target. This hurts me an incredible amount, not just because of the basis of this idea but also because my brother thinks that I am a person who can easily be taken advantage of. Something ticks at me in my brain.

It tells me I've had enough. I'm not staying and living here until everyone calms down and just understands that mine and Cato's relationship is real. No one seems to understand that the Games change you. What you do and see has changed me into something colder, monster like and I wish this wasn't true. And now because of my brother's works I'm worried that mine and Cato's relationship has been built on lies. That he doesn't care at all, that it was some kind of ploy for the viewing public.

The doubt grows in my mind as Cedar just watches me crumble in front of him. Cedar doesn't know if this relationship dies, as does everything. Snow's appeasement for the Districts needs to be kept up otherwise the consequences will be great. It's not as if I can tell Cedar that so much depends on this relationship because I can't, and however fake it was meant to be it isn't now. Me and Cato know this much.

I hope.

"Willow?" I look at my older brother with hardened eyes.

"What Cedar? What do you _want_ to say to me?"

He looks shocked for a split second, the darkness in his eyes takes over his whole facial expression, "Will you take my advice? Even listen to it?"

I scoff before I turn on my heel to get out of here. I don't want to spend another second with my brother and his horrible ideas that he's trying to poison me with. It's distorting everything that I thought was real, and this scares me more than anything. He grabs my arm as I go to leave and I yank it off him, not even bothering to look at him. I walk back through the forest constantly turning back to make sure he hasn't followed me because if he has, I will probably snap at him. No more arguments, I'm done with this. He doesn't follow me (thank goodness) and eventually I get home.

Along the way an idea sparks in my mind. Cato; he said I can go stay with him. But then I think that if I go my family will be angry that I didn't stay with them for my birthday. But I'm an adult, I can make my own decisions and if my decisions are wrong then my family can gloat about being right the whole time. I don't care, I need to see him because I just need someone who understands because I feel like a minority here.

Mom is waiting for me when I get home. She looks worried sick when I open the door and jumps out of her seat at the kitchen table so she can greet me in a hug. "Oh thank goodness you're ok! I'm so sorry..."

I kind of zone out when she speaks because I realize that I'm shutting her off. I'm shutting everyone around me off and it hurts because I can't stop doing it. Hearing the emotion in her voice makes it even worse for me. I feel terrible with myself so I hug her back an incredible amount. I miss how close we were but right now I just can't stay here with them, "Mom I love you, but I think I'm gonna go stay with Cato for a bit. I can't cope with Cedar and everyone just not trusting me."

"Oh sweetheart," she mumbles into my hair, "We do trust you, and Cedar-"

"I'm taking the next train out and you can't stop me."

She pulls away to look at me with a confused expression on her face. "But it's your birthday tomorrow."

"I know. I just need to go Mom and I'll be back soon. I won't be longer than a week, I just need some time to adjust and maybe because of that I'll be nicer to Cedar and perhaps I won't feel like he's criticizing me all the time."

"Did you speak to him?" Her eyes narrow, "Did he upset you?"

"Mom-"

"I'll have a word-"

I sigh before I interrupt a little more sternly, "I'm an adult Mom. And I'm going regardless of what fake apologies you'll force him to give me. He meant his words and you can't tell someone off for having an opinion. He's an adult too, we're not kids anymore."

Again that stunned look appears, "What have we done Willow?"

_Oh god_, I feel like I'm causing and unnecessary amount of pain to my family. I feel like I'm making them hurt with each and every breath, "You haven't done anything. It's just how the Games have changed me, all of this kind of living," I gesture to the way my new house is; all shine and no care, "Is completely pointless. I just need to be with the person who understands me the most right now."

And at that moment, something inside of her must realize how much I need to be with someone who understands. Her face looks like she understands for once and my mind can't comprehend it, "This boy mustn't be as your brother fears then, right?"

I shake my head. "No, he's far from it."

She smiles lightly, "Then one day he'll have to come here so I can meet him. Then we can judge."

Then, strangely enough she helps me pack before I've even called him, helping me to find shirts and trousers that she bought me recently. I don't have to rely on my old well worn second hand clothes from the market anymore, which is strange. My mother then decides that she's the best one to break the news to the rest of the family that I won't be here for my birthday so no-one can shout at me or attempt to make me change my mind. She then leaves me to it with a kiss to the forehead.

"No presents from us until you get back," she jokes, "Are you sure he said it was fine?"

I nod, "Yes Mom don't worry. I'll write to you when I get there okay?"

"Okay, you take care and enjoy yourself. Please don't forget to write to us and please," she sighs and looks at me like a child begging for food, "Don't be too long. A few days tops because it's your birthday and I want to see my little girl."

I nod, and embrace her again, breathing in the pine tree scent that stays with all of us in my home district. Her embrace is fierce, loving and at the same time it reminds me of everything that I missed when I was in the Games. It makes me feel guilty for wanting to leave but I try and convince myself that it's not to hurt them or me, it's to calm me and to make me more accepting on being at home.

When she leaves I go straight to the phone. I look at the buttons and everything and at first I don't know what to make of it as I've never used one before. Then I remember Johanna leaving me some numbers that could be used to call the other victors if I wanted to. So I find them after a little bit of searching and I note Johanna's instructions carefully although her handwriting is a little hard to read like mine. After many mistakes and failed attempts eventually I manage to get a call through to Cato. "Hello?"

His voice already makes me feel calmer, it has a small trace of innocence about it on the phone which makes me smile to myself, "Cato it's me, Willow."

"Willow? What's wrong?"

"Nothing's bad. It's just..." I sigh to myself, I feel rude in asking but I keep on trying to remind myself that he offered and I shouldn't feel guilty, "I can't cope here and you uhm… offered… and I just wanted to ask uhm… whether that still stands."

He pauses for a second as he tries to work out what I meant in my words, "Do you want to stay with me?"

"Yeah," I pause with a slightly embarrassed sigh, "Sorry I felt bad in asking."

"No need to apologize, I meant that offer and you're more than welcome to stay. When do you want to leave?"

I shift a little as I now feel even worse for putting this on him at the last minute, "As soon as possible."

He doesn't even hesitate with his reply which I take as a very good sign, "Go to your Justice Building and find out the train times and take your ID with you. Then come back and call me with the time you'll get here so I can meet you at the station. Ok?"

We disconnect and I find the next train to leave is tonight which I book myself on to. I go back and call him and he agrees to meet me early at the station the next morning. And just like that Cato accepts me, and I wish my family could too.

{-.-}

The train journey seemed quick to me, but it was probably because it was a night train and I was asleep almost the whole time. The train 'car' is opulent but only had two other occupants who appeared to be Capitol officials who noted my presence with keen eyes. I made sure I sat alone and away from them, by one set of doors and near to where one of the people in red stood. I felt safer there because I knew that I wasn't completely alone.

But regardless of me trying to convince myself that I am safer there, the two officials were sat opposite each other and talked rather secretly. I was intrigued because I had nothing else to do and it seemed like they are discussing secrets. Anything to do with my District is interesting, but more importantly as in anything that is kept under wraps. I don't know whether you'd call it human nature or not but I'm just a naturally curious person.

The men were typical Capitol officials. With vaguely eccentric coloured suits yet retained some kind of normality with their appearance, and all of a similar age which I guessed to be around fifty. They only come to Districts on occasion, for meetings or some kind of deals.

Which made me think, _what are they doing here?_

Then I heard them talk.

"She's Iago Crane's new plaything."

"You know for sure?"

"I have to sort it out with very important people."

"So why hasn't she been shipped off yet?"

"His offer is waiting to go through. He bought out all the other competitors for exclusive access."

My blood ran cold and my breathing fluctuated as I tried to understand what they were discussing. _What were they discussing?_ A 'plaything'? I felt sick because this could mean anything, and the way it was said makes me think that…

Y'know what? I don't even want to think about it because I can't predict what's going to happen. It promised something sinister and I can't think about that when I'm meant to get better, I'm meant to become such a better person. I closed my eyes in an attempt to lull me to sleep. I didn't want to hear this, nor would I want to know what will happen. I wanted to focus on the good things, seeing Cato tomorrow, my birthday and being with someone who understands what I've gone through. It takes me too long to get to sleep because the two men are still talking and the words I pick up in their next conversation distract me.

_Power. Blackmail. __**Cato**__._

{-.-}

I didn't sleep very well and I ended up waking extremely early as the lone passenger in the train car. The two officials were already gone and I wondered where everyone was. The woman in red stood nearby still, completely frozen. I made eye contact with her and she came over, placing a sheet of paper down in front of me.

_Food._ My stomach growls as something simple like eating has completely escaped my thoughts. I hadn't eaten since breakfast the previous day and I realised at that moment how much I craved water, and food. What she placed down in front of me was a menu for breakfast and I ordered platefuls of food and drink. It took me only a few seconds to decide not to be frugal, and I panic a little because I always am. This is unlike me.

But regardless I ate everything and maybe half an hour later I'm finally content and I paid the money for what I'd eaten. The money in my pocket still weighs it down too much and the feeling that I actually have money to spend still scares me. I guess maybe I'll get used to this after all although a lifetime of habits surely would have worn off on me a little more. I looked around the train compartment to find a clock which I think gave me an hour before I got to District 2.

I take my bag and got up and out of my seat to find a bathroom. I checked the lock several times before I actually had a shower and washed. I was so petrified of those Capitol officials, and in general I was so afraid. I had never been that bad with personal safety, not even straight after I came home. I was more than unsettled at this point.

But soon though, the train pulled into the station. I'm already back in my seat but was too busy watching the world go by. It's strange to think that this is the same country because the landscape changes dramatically. Eventually when I'm there it feels a little surreal. Being the masonry district, I can see a lot of mountains nearby, with one giant one in particular nearby. It's a strange sight for me because even the vaguely hilly terrain of District 7, it is nothing compared to this.

And the houses, from what I can see are stone, not wood like at home. Even such subtle differences are so alien to me when really, they aren't anything to worry about. I wonder how Cato would react to District 7 if he ever came to visit me, but then again, he probably wouldn't react at all. Once the train pulls to a stop I take my holdall and leave as quickly as I can. I am excited to be with Cato. I'm excited to be accepted.

As soon as I'm off I feel strange, awkward to say the least. I spin around trying to look for him but I can't see him anywhere. That seed of doubt Cedar had planted in my mind about him not caring flourishes and I start to panic a little. I walk through the station building to leave and this is when I feel so under the microscope because people recognise me. People _look_ at me.

There aren't many people in here, which makes the looks all the more powerful. And they aren't nice looks. They're the type of look which means something bad. I can practically hear everyone's thoughts. I'm the girl who made a Career weak. I'm the puny little girl who cried when she killed. I am nothing to these people other than a sign of weakness. My face flushes a little and then, by the exit I spot Cato.

He leans against the wall, he looks tired and vaguely annoyed. He wears these khaki coloured pants, boots and a white t-shirt, which I swear to myself looks a lot like a uniform. But he looks well otherwise than his apparent tiredness. He's probably fine. At least I hope so. I'm just glad he's actually here. But regardless after a few seconds he finally sees me, and his expression lightens into a grin. A completely boyish grin which warms my heart.

I forget all my cares because right now, I'm safe.

{-.-}

**Uhm. Can you forgive me? Probably not. I'm like working full time at the moment so I'm sorry for the lack of updates. I've also struggling with writers block although I know where this story is going. Confusing huh?**

**Anyway, I'll try and update next Sunday. Exams results this week (khasjhasJHS HALP) and working is making me update a day later than the usual day. I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN HUMANITY. Nope. I swear.**

**Anyways, see you next Sunday! PLEASE REVIEW. I love you all for your support C:**


	3. Chapter 3

I walk towards him, gripping my holdall tightly. The holdall is leather and with my slightly sweaty palms it feels like it's falling out of my grasp all the time. Its nerves I think. I'm nervous about meeting him again because the people around me, his fellow members of District 2 obviously don't like me for whatever reason. I'm also nervous about _him_, and seeing him again. The last time I saw him, I guess we could define ourselves as being _together_ but not entirely. But I try not to focus on that, I focus on him. In particular his smile and the way that he's looking at me; the way that he looks makes me feel like something special and _worth something_.

When I get to a matter of steps in front of him he moves off the wall and towards me. What do I feel? Dread? Nerves? I don't know because in a second he pulls me into a short brief hug, which I quickly hug back. I've missed this kind of comfort. I mean, I've had verbal human contact but really nothing compares to being close to someone who understands you so much. It just feels... _right_ to me.

"You look worried," he murmurs into my hair before he lets go, pulling back to look at me with a slight smile. I've missed that smile, the genuine side to him does make me feel as if I've missed him so much for only a few days.

But my cheeks burn a little under his gaze and I smile just slightly at him, I guess I'm not used to being under his scrutiny yet. Maybe I won't ever be, "Nice to see you too."

He smirks at me, or maybe my words. I can't read him very well, and to be honest it's annoying that I'm still like this around him; that I have to know what he's thinking. He knows me real well but it's not the same for me. I can't read him at all. Then he leans down slightly and places his hand over mine holding my bag, "I'll take this for you."

"I'm fine," I retort quickly like a reflex. It's almost as if this is one of the only things I say anymore, which wouldn't surprise me really. Why do I react so badly to his touch? Is it that foreign at the moment? Am I really that affected by him being away from me? I had to keep my mom happy at home a lot of the time by saying that I was fine, and now it's just kind of stuck.

He narrows his eyes as if he can read me. Oh jeez, I even feel like I'm in trouble somehow and then just like that and his voice becomes low and commanding, "Let me take it."

I sigh, knowing that he's won this battle because I don't want to argue with him. Arguing is something that I don't want to happen in however long I'm here for as this visit is meant to be about adjusting to 'normality' and spending time with him; so I want it to be worth something. But what exactly is he trying to do? Prove himself to be the gentleman? I let go and it leaves him with my bag, "Fine," I reply quietly.

"Stubborn as ever," he states with a smirk. I'm not sure if he's mocking me, but the smirk isn't exactly sinister. I'm not sure what he thinks, to be honest. I know what he said when we left the Capitol on the train meant that he cared, but right now I'm getting mixed signals. His physical behaviour was sweet but his actual speech... I don't know. It could be because of the people around us, the judging glances and the hushed whispers, but then this defies the idea of a fake relationship and it being public for everyone to see. Or this behaviour could be because he really doesn't like me after all.

What do I believe? I don't know. I'm not sure if I want to know or not.

"Nasty as ever," I retort whilst I fold my arms, but my voice is light and hopefully doesn't come across as rude in any way. I want to be as annoying as possible to him because he's being so strange to me and the only way my mind thinks is to be as strange back to him. Or mean.

He laughs before he beckons me outside through the train station exit, he goes first, leading the way for me, "Come on, let's get you home and away from _people_."

The way that he says this word makes me feel a little uncomfortable. He's almost degrading their status as humans but for what reason? Is this a side that I didn't realise was there before? Has he noticed their hostility to me or it he just being possessive? I follow him out and into the beaming sunlight of his District and its warm here already considering that it's around six in the morning. I'll have to take this jacket off when I get to his because the climate is so different to back home. I guess my district is quite north in comparison to here and from what I remember from school is that the further north you go, the colder the climate is.

And this terrain is completely alien to me as well, the ground is sand, not dirt and this along with the yellow stone houses makes for a strange sight for me. I guess nothing should surprise me anymore after being in the Capitol for those few days but still, I haven't been to another District before. It's something I never would have dreamed of if things were still relatively normal. But then again, in six months time I would have been to all of the Districts gloating about winning the Games and staring into the faces of dead children's parents. That is normal for the people of Panem.

But my mind right now is still on thinking about his words and what he really meant. I sometimes think that I overanalyse things, but if I didn't I wouldn't know as much as I do now, "What do you mean by _people_?" I query, mimicking his emphasis on that word so he knows what I mean.

He shrugs, "I guess we – me and you – are popular in any other District but here."

"But why?" This is a good start to my birthday; it's just exactly what I needed to hear. What was the point even of even coming here when people would just judge me and make me feel uncomfortable? But I should think that I didn't come here for them or their approval, I came here to see Cato. I shouldn't care about them and what they think because ultimately they are wrong.

"I didn't exactly fill the criteria of an expected victor, and neither did you. The only victors who my District will ever respect are the vicious ones, and only if they come from 2."

I can that already just by being here everything will not be the same. Being here will be uncomfortable, I think as my values and mindset is not the same as the people around me, "So they don't respect other 'career' victors?"

He rolls his eyes at my comment. Perhaps he's a little uncomfortable with this term but somehow, I find it hard to grasp this. There's so much I still don't know about him and maybe over these few days I'll get to know him a little better, "No. To most people District 2 is above every other District. The work ethic here is unreal as we're seen to serve and be the best to the Capitol. And because of this, I guess we're a wealthy District but also in major competition with District 1 and 4."

Competition between the Districts? I shudder at this thought as the brutality of 2 is just starting to show now. Never would I have guessed that there was competition to be seen as the best from the Capitol. The wealth is apparent here as I walk through; no-one wears dirtied clothes, children wear shoes, and I can't see at least one beggar here. The whole atmosphere is almost full of self-importance and worth. I look to my feet as we walk along, I guess I feel a little self-conscious of the gazes around me and also the conversation has dried up a bit. I'm not exactly sure what to say or do which never really helps a lot. I wish I was better with people.

But then as if he can tell I'm struggling with the conversation, he speaks, "I never asked how you were… ignoring the reason why you've come here."

I look at him with a slight smile, and he replies with his own, "Yeah, I guess I'm okay. Not exactly a hundred percent but better than what I was when you last saw me. What about you?"

A playful grin spreads across his face as we walk to out right down a solitary dirt track. I can see more elaborate stone houses which I assume make up District 2's Victor's Village, "I missed you a lot, but other than that I've been fine. Although now you make it sound as if you were sad about how we left each other the last time."

How we left each other… I blush slightly, remembering that train journey and our kisses. It cemented – at least to me – how we feel about each other. I respond with embarrassed glances every now and again along with pause filled speech which obviously give away how I'm feeling, "Oh n-no. That was uhm, nice."

He doesn't respond and I'm left wondering about him until he directs me to a house. It was two floors (like my house back home) and looks like it's been built recently. The whole row of victor's houses looks so tidy and nice, but lacks the greenery of back home. There is the occasional tree here but they're different to the ones I'm used to. Cato reaches into his pocket for a key and unlocks the front door, letting me go in first.

It's very much like mine back home, the layout is pretty much the same; wide open spaces and similar style wooden furniture. I expect to hear a family somehow when I go in but it's quiet. Is he alone? Does he not have a family? I don't want to ask just in case it sounds rude or hurts him, I guess he'll tell me when he's ready. But to think that he is alone makes me feel a little sad, is this why he trained to become a Career tribute?

"And would you like that to continue? Whatever you saw as _nice_?"

I look at him quickly, just catching him standing tall from putting my bag on the floor. I'm distracted away from my serious thoughts and he knows it. I can tell because he's got that grin still on his face which points out he's obviously doing this to make me uncomfortable or to feed that massive ego of his. It's probably a mixture of both knowing him.

I try not to show my embarrassment; which is hard because this kind of attention has never been given to me. I was the girl back home who put her head down and worked hard to keep her family afloat. It was pretty much common knowledge that I was destined to help my family for the rest of my days, not do anything for myself. I've never sought out this kind of attention until I met him and with his attention I feel alive for once.

I shrug, trying to ignore my semi-permanent blush that's on my face. I actually want to know what he thinks about our _relationship_ (if I can even call it that) and this seems to be the perfect time. I don't want to be hurt and all I want to know it that his words on the train were true; '_I care about you_'. Those words meant a lot and if he never meant them I want to know before I could really get hurt, "Well do you want it to?"

He takes a step towards me and I don't flinch, I want him to be close to me as I've missed him so much, "You know I'd want it to. I feel something for you and you know it."

I smile a little, I feel relief in his words. I think he means it and now I am beyond reassured. I feel so safe, "I guess. But it just seems a little unreal to me, however much I want it to continue."

"What do you mean by 'unreal'?" He frowns, not understanding what I mean.

"It's just… no-one has ever shown an interest in me," I blush a little, what I'm saying is deeply personal and to be honest embarrasses me. Nineteen years old and I'm like this, I'm _ashamed_, "So to have someone actually caring and showing an interest is hard to believe."

His eyes flicker to the floor before they come back to look at mine, a genuine boyish smile on his face. Cato takes a few steps towards me so he's just in front of me; a matter of centimetres between us. He places a kiss on my forehead, his lips just staying there even after. It's a silent reassurance to me and I'm grateful that he doesn't have to or want to argue with me, and because of this I close my eyes just to savour the moment a little more. He realises how much I want this to work maybe, and for this I'm so grateful.

"Happy birthday," he whispers. It sends shivers down my spine and for what reason I have no idea. I thought he would have forgotten anyway, it wasn't exactly a major detail to pick up and to even remember this is touching. It's nice to know that I'm not forgettable to someone.

"Thank you," I say just as quiet back. It doesn't feel right to be the louder participant when we are both equals here. I don't open my eyes, and instead I just keep them shut. I silently beg him not to move away from me.

I hear the rustle of fabric for a second before he pulls something from one of his pockets. I don't look because I'm too absorbed in the moment. Being here and like this feels good and makes me feel content. Then I feel him move away from my head and my eyes open as I feel his left hand pull my right towards him. He places something smooth on to it. I hesitate a glance to see what it is, and it's a flat box.

Is this a present to me? He doesn't have to, I'm not the type of person who wants to receive gifts because in my mind, the money can be put to better use. I feel like this is wasted money. I look up at him and I shake my head, "Cato you didn't have to-"

"But I wanted to," he interrupts calmly. His left hand hasn't quite left mine yet, "I wanted to get you something... memorable. Look just open it, please?"

I study the box a little more intently, "Fine," I bring my left hand to the box and pull the lid free; revealing the contents inside.

I think I gasp, I'm not sure if Cato reacts in the way that I would have hoped, I can see a concerned expression on his face. I'm staring at a necklace. It appears to have been made from some kind of light metal and a part of me prays that it isn't silver. If it is then this will be a very expensive and elaborate gift that I don't think I would want to keep. On the actual necklace chain is a silver coloured leaf no bigger than a finger nail. It is detailed with the little lines that even make up a real one. Obviously, a lot of thought has gone into this present.

"You don't like it?" Cato sounds panicked, I look up at him and I smile as widely as I can.

This is overwhelming. I wasn't expecting anything like this from him and now he's given me something like _this_, "I love it," I mean those words so much, maybe my emotion shines through a little but he looks at me and a small smile starts to return to his face, "It's just so much to accept. I've never... had anything like this."

"I just wanted something for you to keep that would be like a memory. A good memory," He sighs lightly and takes the chain gently from the box, and takes the box and lid from my hands into his pocket again, "If you wear this all the time, then hopefully then you'll be reminded that you're not alone. I'm always there." He walk round to my back to place it around my neck, the cold metal surprises me.

"You didn't have to buy me anything to tell me that though, I trust your word."

He sighs again, "Yeah but sometimes you need a little more than just a word, don't you?" His hands graze my neck as he does up the chain. I shiver in response because his touch is so ghostly it makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

I grimace slightly because I know his words are completely true. Maybe I can change the subject onto something else, like maybe what this is made of, "This is just metal, isn't it?"

He's quiet for too long and his hands move to be on my shoulders. He sighs a lot; too much in fact that makes me uncomfortable, "You shouldn't worry about how much money I spend. I can spend what I want and besides, just be happy for once. It's your birthday after all."

I sigh this time. I'm a little awkward because I feel like I've dampened the mood again. I'm not exactly a glass half full person at the moment and I regret my words. I wish that things could change with me but I think this is who I am now; the new me. Before I could even say my reply I feel softness against my neck and arms go around my middle. I can tell that he's planted a small kiss on my neck and he engulfs me. But it's this action that makes me regret my latest words to him. I feel like I haven't shown how grateful I am.

"Thank you so much Cato, but it's just," I sigh, "I don't know how to accept it."

He moves his lips from my skin just slightly but he speaks low into it anyway, "You don't have to worry Willow, I know what you mean."

"I'm so bad with words," I mumble half to myself.

He plants another small kiss on my neck, "It's endearing."

"Me making a fool of myself?"

"Yes."

He lets go of me and I see a perfect opportunity to take a step forward to take off my jacket, feeling that the weather today is going to be way too hot. I put it on top of my bag and I turn around to him, my hands going to my neck and to feel the coldness of the silver, I'm assuming. I survey his face with a slight smile, and he looks at me with one on his. However much we're silent it's not awkward, but comfortable. My hands move around to the leaf and I pull it from my neck and twiddle with it in a slight nervous gesture.

"Thank you," I say again.

He smiles a little brighter, but his focus flickers to my neck and my fiddling for just a few seconds, "You know, you don't have to keep on saying 'thank you' all the time. I know you mean it."

"But it's not just that," I begin, "It's for letting me stay and for being so accepting and kind when others aren't entirely."

Cato looks like he's thinking for a few seconds, his gaze looks to the floor before he looks back at me. I think he's concerned, "Do you want to talk about it?"

I shrug, the smile on my faces fades as I mull over talking about everything that's happened. Since most of it concerns him and how my family don't trust him, I guess that we shouldn't really talk about this today. Maybe soon, "I do, but not today. I want today to be about you and me. Tomorrow maybe, I'll talk about it but not now."

"Okay," He starts before he walks up to me yet again. His blue eyes that I once found so cold don't just gaze at me, he's trying to read me and my body language. I wonder what he's thinking because that slight smile makes me feel comforted. And I now find his eyes comforting, and yet the irony is is that I find my brother's to be the cold ones in comparison. It's startling how people change. But the looks Cato gives me is intense; perhaps even _hunger_.

"What?" I ask, slowly becoming a little more uncomfortable. I move my hand from the leaf to my side instead, was it distracting him? His gaze is still just as intense however, so maybe it wasn't.

His smile turns into a vague smirk, "I'm just admiring you, if that's allowed."

I raise an eyebrow as a blush comes to my cheeks, this makes me extremely embarrassed. I'm still not used to this attention that he showers me with, "'Admiring me'?"

"You know what I mean."

Maybe I do, but I just can't accept this. Before I can argue he places his hands either side of my face gently. He strokes my cheeks a little with that small smile returning to his face, "That blush suits you y'know. It gives you a little more character."

He knows exactly how to annoy me and to make me squirm; I hate it. I want him to stop. I suddenly think that perhaps I should play his game by being mocking towards him. So I raise an eyebrow, "Please don't make me uncomfortable," I smirk at him slightly which reinforces that this is not me begging for him to stop. You have no idea how much I want to mock him and make him be the uncomfortable one for once.

But he seems completely unfazed by this, "I wasn't planning on doing that. But since a blush suits you so much..." He trails off and removes his right hand and places a kiss on my cheek over my blush, which causes me to blush even more.

I try and stop myself from getting embarrassed but it's really hard not to. He exploits my weaknesses well and this annoys me a lot because I can never seem to be the one who can find the weakness in him. Maybe I'll find a weakness during my stay, and then perhaps I won't feel so stupid. He doesn't move from next to my cheek and I feel a little more uncomfortable as all I can feel is his breath on my skin and his lips there. All this affection is a lot to get used to if I'm honest. I'm not used to it in the slightest. And what I hate is that he knows how to push my buttons.

"This isn't nice," I say, almost whining in annoyance, "You're being so mean to me. I can't help if I blush at things."

He pulls his head away a little so he can face me, his left hand still stuck to my cheek, "And that's why I love it. But if you're so upset with me being mean to you then this will make it up to you."

Cato leans down and places a soft kiss on my lips. It's so intoxicating and loving I close my eyes just to savour the moment more and more. He always pulls me in, and not vice versa as I guess I'm still not used to the idea of _being_ with someone. I notice that this kiss is something gentle and meaningful, not mirroring the passion we always seemed to put into our kisses. This one reminds me of our public onstage kiss but this one has a lot more feeling put into it. It has our feelings in it not just desire. He moves his lips just slightly against mine as if he's testing my reactions to see if I want this. I do, and without hesitation I move mine against his but mirroring his gentleness.

My head is being tilted up a little more, the hand on my cheek moving my head closer just slightly. I almost forget that he's quite a bit taller than me, but not a ridiculous amount. I place my hands on his chest as if to cement him here with me because this keeps him within my grasp. His right hand is placed in the back of my neck with just a light touch, his fingers moving slightly in my hair.

After a few seconds I feel him pull away a little and I open my eyes, looking into his with a small smile on my face. In response he replies with a boyish grin of his own which obviously means he's pleased with himself.

"Did that make it up to you?" He whispers with a mischievous glint in his eye.

I shrug in an attempt to be playful, "It'll do I guess."

He laughs loudly and we just stay like that, both looking at each other for a few more seconds before I manage to wriggle out of his grasp. I think it becomes a little uncomfortable to be like that and I don't want to be constantly kissing him. I enjoy talking with him like he's a close friend too. He laughs again and I stick my tongue out at him briefly.

"You're cute when you're like this," he says with that grin still not leaving his face.

I sigh and give him a sarcastic response, "Isn't that nice."

He rolls his eyes and heads over to some kitchen cupboards as if to find something. Along the way he puts down the empty necklace box on the side. The place is immaculate and so clean; does he keep it like this all by himself? I guess though that we've only been in our news homes for a few days anyway. Things have happened quickly, "I was going to call you innocent but the sarcasm kinda ruined it for me."

Innocent? I run a hand through my hair as I try and work out how he could call me this. After everything I have done and seen I am not at all innocent really. I'm in a state of confusion as I begin to wonder whether Cato is completely blind to reality or not, "What do you mean by innocent?"

He turns around to look at me, and for a split second he looks slightly upset. Maybe a little bit angry too but it disappears after a split second and is replaced with a very small smile. So small it doesn't even look like he's happy, "You act so childish sometimes, and naïve too. Despite everything that's happened you're still the same person from before you walked into the arena."

But I can tell however that there's something else he means. He can't meet my gaze which obviously means something. _Just tell me, please,_ I think. I don't want secrets between us. I want us to be trusting of each other and more importantly there for one another. This trust between us keeps me sane, and the thought of him hiding something reignites my fears that I had when I arrived.

By now he's already turned round to the cupboard and he brings out a small bottle of what appears to be pills. He places them on the side and closes the cupboard before turning around to me.

"You okay?" He asks with a subdued tone.

"Fine," I lie before I walk a little closer. I lean against the worktop island before I gesture to the pills, "You're not sick are you?"

He shakes his head, "No, they're just for keeping me healthy. Like vitamins and stuff. It helps with training too."

_Vitamins_. That word is foreign on my tongue; I'm not used to it. I daren't ask what it means in case it makes me look completely stupid. I fold my arms and watch him go to another cupboard and put on the worktop two glasses. Did he also say training? He stills does that? _I guess he was a Career for a reason, that work ethic must still be there._

"Have you eaten today?" He asks, glancing at me as he walks over to the fridge. That appliance is something new to me too; it's strange how different my life is now. How there are so many more things that I hadn't even known about before. He opens it and pulls out a glass bottle of orange juice, I think, before he closes the fridge door and heads to the glasses.

"Yeah. I ate on the train," He pours the liquid into the two glasses and hands one to me and I take it with a small smile, "Thank you."

He nods before he takes a pill from the bottle and pops it in his mouth, before he takes a few sips of his glass of juice. He then sets the glass down and I take a few sips of mine to quench the thirst that I've been ignoring in favour of talking to him.

"It's not a bad thing to be called innocent y'know."

He's looking me in the eye with a slightly serious expression on his face. I nod slightly before I take another sip, ready to argue my point back, "But come on, Cato. I'm nineteen years old."

He sighs and I take another sip of juice before I set it down on the counter too, "It was… the way you were innocent and naïve that kept me human… in the arena," He struggles to get out the words, obviously uncomfortable with the subject. I don't blame him because talking about such events isn't something you want to do all the time. Particularly on what was meant to be a happy day. But this information is news to me and I can't help but smile a little at this, that it was my personality that helped him.

"Really?" I ask quietly, my gaze never leaving his eyes.

"Yes," he says simply with a smile.

I smile back widely before I become a little embarrassed I so I look to the floor and my right hand goes to twiddle with the leaf necklace again. It seems that I've got a new nervous habit to keep me occupied whenever I need it. My hand grazes my t-shirt fabric every now and again because it's quite high necked.

"Stop that."

My eyes dart up in surprise at Cato's commanding tone. That's when I see that hunger in in him that appeared just briefly earlier and for a second I'm afraid, "Why?"

He puts his hands in his pant pockets and gives me a smirk. His eyes roam my body for just a second, but even that is long enough to make me feel stupidly uncomfortable. I blush a little more as he approaches, I remove my hand from the necklace. But strangely enough he goes as if to walk past me, but stop next to my ear to whisper. Just close enough so his lips graze my earlobe.

He doesn't forget, does he?

He speaks in a low voice, one that promises something. But it's comforting in a way, "It makes me realise how stunning you really are and how you're _my_ girlfriend."

He then walks to the living room side of the space around me, and I smile a little to myself. So this is where we stand after all; we're together and not apart. It takes me a few seconds before I turn around and follow him because his words have settled a lot of doubt, and that is one of the best birthday presents I could ever recieve.

{-.-}

**I'm sorry to you all, I really am. Updates could be soon, or never. University takes pride of place.**


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